I thank you for your concern

a test, we are allowed to get pronouns wrong, and would you think it OK to be annoyed with someone who wanted to be referred to as Black and not coloured or Negro?

We all want equality, don’t we? We should all have equal respect, equal pay, equal rights. That’s what feminism is all about, and what every civil rights struggle has been about. But rights aren’t like cake; someone else getting some doesn’t mean you have any less. Maybe we all need to examine our phobias and see if some of them are more about our fear of the unknown, and consider if we are allowing that to dictate opinions we might otherwise baulk at.

But when it comes to trans rights – or rather, trans demands – they are like cake, as  a number of commenters are only too happy to point out:

• ‘But rights aren’t like cake; someone getting some doesn’t mean you have any less.’ Transwomen playing in women’s sports have an unfair advantage over women and in some sports increase the risks to women of injury. World Rugby research has shown that the risks of injury to women increase by 20% – 30% if tackled by a transwoman. The advantages of a male physique are not removed by transitioning. Women have a right to single sex sport. This isn’t the only area that is impacted – transwomen being placed in female prison estate, women’s refuges etc. This piece essentially boils down to ‘be nice’ without understanding the real issues that women face.
• Struggling to find a reason why I, a woman, needs a man to tell me my concerns about trans rights taking precedence over women's rights are indeed fears I need to address. My rights as a woman have been long fought for and for the sake of my daughter and granddaughters I will never give up on that.
• It's always lovely when a chap pops up to tell silly women they've been doing feminism wrong. Decades of academic feminist texts and women's activism and what we should be doing is to be nice and do as we are told. No, feminism is not about "equality" (that would be egalitarianism) and it's certainly not about centring men. It is about women – our needs and protections. It may shock you, but we don't care about how people dress or what they call themselves as long as our rights are respected. Women are afraid of men who seek to violate boundaries. That isn't a "phobia" or irrational, and it certainly, sadly, is not "fear of the unknown". The notion that women are ignorant to fear male violence when 1 in 4 is a victim of sexual assault and 1 in 10 a victim of rape is incredibly distasteful. 98% of violent crime is committed by men and this doesn't change with identity. Naturally, not all men, but you will forgive us if we regard with suspicion those fully intact males who demand entry to places where women are especially vulnerable. Women are entitled by law to services and spaces. If Alan, like many others, wish to remove our rights (because this cake analogy doesn't work when women are being told we aren't allowed even crumbs!), he needs to be honest. He appears to have zero concern for women's well evidenced concerns. He seems to see us as little more than support humans. This is sexist gaslighting and I'm pretty appalled it was published.